Tuesday, September 2, 2008

The Common Thread of Stupidity, Guyland, and the Happiness of Chocolate

I as sit on my couch watching "Jail" on MyTV Buffalo, I realize how sad our society really is. People having to wear spit masks because for obvious reasons they were spitting at the cops, people have to wear paper clothes because they try to hang themselves with their regular clothes, people start fighting because their cellmate farted in their face. Now, 99% of these people on this show are intoxicated, so I wonder what the cause of their stupidity, hmmmmm.... let me think... could it be the common thread of alcohol? Maybe? It's just a hunch I have, another one of my theories, but I must say that this theory seems right on the nose. I mean, I'm not opposed to drinking, I don't drink, when I did in college, I was social drinker. I would have one drink and be done for the night and I only did that a handful of times. I never saw the point in drinking, most of the alcoholic beverages I didn't even like, I never liked the idea of throwing up from drinking too much, having a horrible hangover, or losing complete control of myself. I mean I'm not a fan of drinking, but I have friends who drink, as long as it's done responsibly, I don't have a problem with it. But I don't see why people drink to the point of blacking out and what not, what's the point? Why would you want to drink to the point of acting like an a** and getting thrown in jail? I wish there was someway to limit how much people drink, I think that would eliminate a lot of problems, and how would in be enforced? I mean first off it's a free country and people can drink themselves to stupidity if they want to and second prohibition never worked, so why would limiting people's alcohol consumption? If people want to drink themselves to stupidity, they're going to find a way to do so, whether they have to break laws or not. I just know plenty of college guys who drink themselves to stupidity and I know a lot of them think this is a trait women look for in men. *rolls eyes*

I was reading an article on a book called "Guyland" and how guys from ages 16 to 26 are stuck in this guyland phase. According to the article, guyland is the career aimlessness, beer and porn that is the center of today's male universe. Apparently today's male generation between the ages of 16 and 26 are stuck between adolescence and adulthood. They don't want to grow up and take responsibility. Fabulous! Notice there's no girlland, if there was it would be written about girls from 18 to 28 and how ticked we are that we seem to be maturing and the guys around us seem to be at a stalemate from the minute they hit puberty and they try caveman antics to woo us. I'm in my early twenties, a college graduate for over a year now and I've matured enough to hold down a job, estabilish my own company, and manage to volunteer in my spare time. Grant it, I don't have the social life I would like to have, I would still love to be in college and hang out at the local bars with all my old college buddies, but that's just not possible, why because being a gainfully employed adult has taken precedent. I just don't understand why guys can idle in guyland and not have to grow up and be responsible, but girls must. Probably because guys make more money than girls do even though they are doing the exact same job allows them to live in guyland. Where is it written that if you have a vagina, you must be a mature adult by age 18, but if you have penis your allowed to mature at your own pace? hmmmmm? In the article it states that guys are scared of facing the real world and responsibility and that's why they linger in guyland, well fellas heres a memo, us, girls, we're scared of the real world and responsibility too, but guess what? We grew a set and faced our fears and dealt with it! Maybe being brave and tough should be changed to having a vagina instead of having a set of balls, because clearly, us, girls are the stronger species. Maybe we aren't stronger physically, but I swear mentally we are. What's the old saying, "If guys had to deal with the pain of labor, it would be the end of mankind as we know it." Did you ever deal with a guy who had a cold? *imitating a whiny guy* "I can't go to work today, *fake cough cough* I have a cold, *Fake cough cough Fake sniff sniff*." SERIOUSLY?!?!? I've danced with a 104.1 degree fever before. I kept blacking out, but guess what? The show must go on, so I slapped a smile on my face, tried to swallow down the vomit I was about spew on the stage, and let go of the curtain in the wings long enough to perform a forty five minute dance. UGH! *Long, Deep Sigh* I guess, I'm just frustrated. All you want is someone who is at least man enough to handle the real world and all it's responsibility and treat you as a equal who leans on you when they need to and you can lean on them when they need too. Oh, yeah, and some wit! Is wit too much to ask for?

Ah, but my dear friend chocolate is here to comfort me. Do you ever notice how chocolate can make everything better? It must be true, because I ate three mini-Hershey bars, and it puts a smile on my face. They were cold, so that makes them even better. I love cold chocolate, the crunchiness and then the way your mouth heats it up and it melts... yummmmmm... I maybe hitting a fourth and fifth mini-Hershey bar tonight, to put an extra big smile on my face.....

I should appologize real quick and say that I have several guy friends who have graduated from guyland in the proper amount of time and are now mature, gainfully employed adults. It just seems to be that the mature men are being greatly outnumbered by the 'dudes' stuck in guyland.

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